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 Wed May 05, 2004 « recent »
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 HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MICHELLE! I know Amanda Snyder was late, but I think that she deserves a LJ user pic prize for the following "Debbie memory" entry, which I found highly amusing: ----- "Okay I'm late but here's mine: Debbie and I were working at the now-closed Chicken Ranch in Nevada. (She was calling herself Lotus then.) Debbie specialized in that whole Asian woman fantasy thing. You know, the kimono, she'd talk in broken English and do the subservient woman act. Give them baths and act like it was the greatest thing that ever happened to her. Never mind that she'd never been with a man without being paid in her entire life. She would've done women for free but she was working to pay off her rehab bill and couldn't afford the distraction. Debbie had gotten hooked on painkillers after that skydiving accident. It wasn't really her fault, just bad luck combined with a bad doctor and a bad breakup with a bad girlfriend. Anyway, this guy came in and wanted me to pretend to be his wife who caught them together and then beat Debbie up. Well, this didn't go over well and we pretended that we'd gotten mixed up and ended up kicking the shit out of him. We said that we thought we told him the safe word was 'Marinara' and since he never said it, we just kept hitting him. We got fired and Debbie said she was going to leave the country and start fresh. She had some talent with drawing and writing. She shaved eight years off her age and enrolled in a university up in Canada. Last I heard she was playing music and had invented a whole past for herself. She'd gotten back in touch with a girl she'd worked with at an Asian massage parlor and they were covering for each other as sisters. Apparently they'd gone out to flea markets and bought old photos of kids that they've been passing off as themselves. They've also adopted an old Japanese mobster and they call him their father. He gives them money and they keep him happy, finding him women and opium. She had a whole business that she'd sold to a bigger company. But, one of the execs in the big company used to be one of Debbie's regulars and got kinda freaked out when he saw her. He ended up closing down the deal rather than deal with her on a regular basis. I swear some people can't understand that it was just business! I gotta hand it to her. I know I couldn't keep it up." ---- Amanda, I adore you. :-D For those who haven't seen it, by the way, here is the Anti-Blathering that my friend Parki wrote a long while back. You'll probably only really appreciate it if you know me in person; I very rarely swear, for example, and I have somehow developed a reputation for being always cheerful and patient and tolerant and never losing my temper. (pause while Debbie's husband Jeff falls over in hysterics) Sometimes I WANT to swear, but longterm childhood conditioning makes it nearly impossible. So I yell ineffective things like, "SHOOT!" and "RATS!" instead. Dangit. Made the following picture for my friend Andy in appreciation for his "Debbie memory" last week:  Made the following LJ userpics for singlemaltsilk as a prize for her "Debbie memory" last week. I was only going to make one, but then was having too much fun so kept going. :-)
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