TechnoNerdboy

Words and music by Debbie Ridpath Ohi
with help from Andrew Platzer and Jeff Ridpath
-- Thanks to Paul Kwinn for inventing the term! --

TechnoNerdboy aired on national radio, April 6th, 1996 (CBC's Basic Black show)
and is on Urban Tapestry's second album, Myths and Urban Legends.
Hear a soundclip by going to this album's CDBaby page and clicking on the first track!

E        A             C      D
Back in '81, I used to date a guy who had the
E                A            C        D
bod of Arnold Schwarzenagger (not TOO shy!), he was
E              A                 C             D
captain of the football team with physique so fine, he had a
C7                                  B7
chest of steel and it was real and twice as big as mine, well he was

Eye candy and looked great in a suit, but I
dropped him when I found he thought a Mac was a fruit cuz
all he ever talked about was football and his tie, and I                  
found I really craved a very special kind of guy....(I want a)

CHORUS:
Em            Asus4            
Techno-Nerdboy, please send me e-mail
Em            Asus4           
Techno-Nerdboy, a special he-male who will
C                    
Degauss my CRT 
B7                         Em  E
I'm Veronica, you're Archie.

Late one night I read a posting from a real cool guy
While perusing alt.barney.die.die.die (" alt dot barney die die die")
So I sent him e-mail about purple pedophiles and then
He wrote back, his message full of grins and ascii smiles.

"Hey," I thought, "This one sounds neat, he's not like other guys"
He knew all my protocols, I felt my baudrate rise (uh-huh), a
guy with cache and bit depth sure was welcome on my end, my
terminal was ready and he was clear to send (cuz he's a)

CHORUS:   	
Techno-Nerdboy, carrier detected, Ma'am
Techno-Nerdboy, zap my parameter RAM
Degauss my CRT 
I'm Veronica, you're Archie.

"I could Gopher your WAIS" he said, I took this in stride
though I must confess I went all GUI inside
I waited, so nervous...was his data too corrupt?
Would there be graphics? Would something interrupt?

He used a dedicated line to open a connection
We went from simple handshaking to high-speed affection
And then he said to me, his words calling 'cross the net: "If
you'll be my Amiga, darlin', I will be your Pet" (cuz I'm a)

CHORUS:   	
Techno-Nerdboy, carrier detected, Ma'am
Techno-Nerdboy, zap my parameter RAM
Degauss my CRT 
I'm Veronica, you're Archie.